VISION QUEST:
THE WILDERNESS VIGIL
The wilderness vigil is one of the most simple yet powerful initiatory passage rites available to us in the modern era.
Peoples and cultures the world over have long curated initiatory rituals.
A way of turning and tuning their ears to the pulse of the earth and cosmos; an ancient way of marking, celebrating and honouring life transitions; a way of deepening into the mysteries of life, death and rebirth.
While the transitions from childhood > adolescence > adulthood can be some of the most notable life changes, the rhythms of nature are forever initiating us into the many seasons of our lives, with passage rites serving to mark and anchor in these important life stages.
Traditional rites of passage, which typically involve reasonable degrees of psycho-emotional, physical, and spiritual challenge, have almost been forgotten in our modern culture.
As far as we know, there has never been a greater time to rehydrate these initiatory processes.
To ask the big questions in life.
To ripen and mature as individuals.
To better hear the stirrings of heart, soul and spirit.
To become better leaders, wayshowers and role models for the younger generations.
To walk our unique paths of mission, vision, purpose, potential, and the greater destiny calling us forth.
It’s time to answer that bone-deep call;
to explore more of your truth; your gifts; your power;
your potential; your vision for life…
Imagine this: you’re solo fasting in the wilderness…
Four days and nights in the wild cocoon of nature.
Winds whisper across mountain peak and lowland valley. Shooting stars whir over your head in the dark of night. The creatures of the forest speak to you in mysterious ways.
Nothing but you and the wild emanation of nature; of spirit.
This is what your ancestors were doing for thousands of years.
Fasting in nature. Asking the big questions. Severing from the endless distractions. Gaining clarity on the path forward. Receiving medicine gifts to bring back to community. Reclaiming personal power. Opening the doors to a more rich and meaningful existence. Seeking vision for a life aligned to mission, vision, purpose.
This is not metaphorical.
Nor a thing of the past.
It’s still available.
It’s still alive.
For the people that choose to deviate from the norms of modern living, who choose to sever from the conditioned expectations of society, who refuse to succumb to complacency and stagnation, this is the potential.
Imagine what’s possible when you have the courage to explore new edges, to sit in silence and solitude in the vast expanse of nature, letting spirit speak through you in a powerful way.
Imagine your own esoteric transformation, exploring new depths and bringing that transmission back for your people as valuable insight, much needed change, and profound wisdom.
Intentional action and purposeful living.
Vision Quest holds the key.
“There was once a time when the ritual of seeking a vision was as important and as much a part of a man’s life as his birth and death.”
- Gabriel Horn (White Deer of Autumn) | The Book of Ceremonies
Most familiarity with Vision Quest might come from the native traditions of North America…
However, similar initiation rites of extended time and solitude in nature can be found cross-culturally across our world.
Sacrificing many comforts and familiarities for multiple days and nights on end, the wilderness vigil involves a surrendering to the wild cocoon of nature; an opportunity to see anew; to heal; to tend to the challenges of life; to call in the greater vision for what’s possible; to return regenerated; to expand into the great mysteries.
Wilderness guide, storyteller and mythologist, Dr Martin Shaw, says it like this:
“We are out there to hear more than the whirring cogs of our own drama. The emphasis in rites of passage is you need to be porous to the mysteries awhile. And most of us need quite a shakedown to get to that point… It’s only then you may breathe deep enough to behold what the gods are trying to really disclose to you. And traditionally that’s best encountered in a wild and lonely place.”
Typically, the wilderness vigil involves:
Fasting (no food, only water)
Multiple days of solitude in nature
Remaining in a small Purpose Circle / Dreaming Wheel
Trading comfort for shelter (no tent, only a tarp)
No technology nor entertainment
No contact with the outside world
It's no small feat to undertake a Vision Quest.
There’s libation required. Sacrifice. Payment. “Giving things up to attend to the unfolding”, Shaw would say. “You are the offering. Your time is the offering. Your rapture and discomfort is the offering.”
Such is the nature of sacred reciprocity.
In order to receive big things, we need to give big things.
Many people hear the call, few take heed and follow through.
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“THE MOST POWERFUL TRANSFORMATION EVER…”
- Peter Ballas
At 57 years old, I had a calling for a nature-based vigil to reflect and work through unanswerable questions.
Who was I?
What will my next chapter be?
What do I do with the bone pile dragging behind me?
After meeting Caiyuda, I completed my first Vision Quest at 58 years old in Oct 2024. It was THE most powerful transformation process I had ever experienced. Caiyuda’s facilitation, guidance, and ability to hold space was first class.I emerged from the VQ with my bone pile formally buried; a metaphorical death and a clearer vision of who I was. And more importantly, who I wasn’t.
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“CLARITY, HEALING & EXPANDED AWARENESS”
- Michelle Allen
Wow… Intense and super confronting. This is such a powerful path.
It never ceases to amaze me what unfolds after the experience. The clarity, healing and expanded awareness that has come through these last few days has been PROFOUND. On a physical, mental and spiritual level!
I’ve been called to these ancient ways of healing for some time and feel so, so grateful that I came across Caiyuda to guide me into this path. I’m feeling humbled, grounded, super conscious, connected, CLEAR and very certain about myself and my path and what I am here to do.
If these ancient ways into sacred healing are calling, this here is your man. A true modern day Shaman doing work that has chosen him to the highest degree. Looking forward to the next journey.
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“PROFOUND HEALING & INNER WISDOM”
- Tracey Burgess
What an exceptional experience you created for us all. The most sacred and yet daunting thing I have ever done. I’m envisioning what the new ‘Book of Gaia’ looks like and what I want to bring into my life, alongside my medicine gifts to offer community & spirit.
I’ve been simmering in my new inner wisdom and integrating this profound experience. I’m forever grateful for the profound healing that I received.
I would recommend this to any one who is up for a challenge and who is willing to go within… who really wants to move their soul to evolve, grow, expand, push the boundaries and become the person they want to be.
All the answers are within us… we just need the time out…no distractions. Nature is our mirror.
There are many reasons why someone might hear the call to Vision Quest:
Seeking answers to life’s big questions
Transformation and reclaiming your power
Finding your authentic soul path
Seeking clarity, meaning and deeper purpose
Calling in a life reset and severing from the old
Tending to your unacknowledged pain and grief
Reconnecting with what you truly yearn for in life
Shaking up the stagnancy and busyness of modern living
Severing from the distractions and addictions of modernity
Exploring the mysteries and divine communion with nature
Life transitions; including severing the old and birthing the new
To dream and be dreamt by the wild mythic stories of the land
Experiencing your heart, soul and spirit in a deep and meaningful way
Marking, honouring, or celebrating your life story — where you’ve been and what’s to come
“It is good to be alone, for solitude is difficult; that something is difficult should be one more reason to do it."
- Rainer Maria Rilke
The wilderness vigil presents a clear invitation to thoughtfully address some of life’s big questions:
“Who am I?”
“How are my wounds and gifts related?”
“What medicines do I have to offer the world?”
“Who are my people and how am I serving them?”
“Where am I within the ever-changing seasons and cycles of my life?”
“Where am I refusing to acknowledge and claim my own unique flowering?
Sincerely reflecting on these questions can open opportunities to get in touch with your souls journey; your visionary path; your original blueprint; your true nature, a deeper sense of belonging — within your human communities and the wider community of nature of which we’re all a part.
This doesn’t necessarily mean that life becomes easier after a Vision Fast.
On the contrary, as we deepen into the wholeness, richness and multi-dimensionality of life, our lives as a consequence can become paradoxically both more difficult, and more profound.
Vision Quest is not a cure-all; a fixative; a panacea.
An initiatory passage rite of this nature will potentially reveal the complexities of life and our unique constellation within it. Courting these challenges and re-inhabiting the aspects of self that have been suppressed, numbed, or cast out can be dark work. Earth work.
Wild Twin work.
“Waking the Bone Pile” Dr Martin Shaw calls it. “Likely it’s going to burden you with that arrangement… It’s a holy thing, that burden. We are culturally drowning in ignorance of it. Your legs should totter a little underneath it.”
And so it is, to step into life with all it’s fullness — the challenges, the blessings, the pain, the beauty; rather than live a life void of a greater depth, meaning and purpose.
As the great poet David Whyte said, “We are the only species that can refuse our own flowering”.
Participating in a Vision Fast is an offering of ourselves to something larger, something more intimate, so that we may indeed have an opportunity to claim our own blossoming.
This ancient rite of passage can help us navigate the challenges and complexities of life; encouraging us to realize that both our wounds and our gifts are related, and that we each have a unique role to fill and valuable medicine to offer the world.
“The impact of this experience has been absolutely profound — a pivotal point in my life. The sense of strength I have gained within myself gives me courage to move forward in a way I did not have before this experience.
The space where we gathered for our sharing felt safely held by Caiyuda. Being able to share and unburden in this way created the core of my deep healing process.”
- David W | 2025 Vision Quest Participant
UPCOMING VISION QUEST PROGRAMS
Now taking expressions of interest for our Spring ‘25 Vision Quest.
September - October 2025.
Victoria, Australia.
Approx 3.5 hours from Melbourne.
Please use the form below to send us a message.
What are the three stages of a Vision Quest?
There are various ways to bring structure to what a Vision Fast entails, however the three classic stages of any initiatory passage rite includes:
Preparation / Severance
Threshold / Experience
Incorporation / Return
PREPARATION / SEVERANCE
The initial preparation stage of a Vision Fast begins to take place the day one makes a commitment to participating in this passage rite. Ideally, one would have many months to prepare for such a significant experience in one’s life.
One’s intention, and the exploration thereof, continues to take root during the preparation stage, with a deepening clarification coming to fruition as one enters the formal community container of the Vision Fast.
Often this community of participants will gather in council to listen to each other’s stories of what brings them to Quest, with the Guide serving to assist in the solidification and clarification of their intent.
Inherent within this commitment to Quest, amongst the myriad reasons as to why someone might tend to this calling, is Severance. “Who am I? Who have I been? What am I being asked to let go and leave behind in order to emerge renewed?”
The psychological deaths that passage rites can bring forth are a necessary stage of birthing the new; whether it be through ego dissolution, a shattering of one’s identities and roles, the dismantling of one’s beliefs and dogmas, or letting go of old stories to allow for new potentials and opportunities to arise.
Severance can be difficult, and what one is severing from may not be all that clear upon the initial formation of one’s intentions, however the illumination of the cyclical rhythms of death and rebirth; letting go and liberation; releasing and renewal, are an integral process to experiencing and actualizing a life of greater depth; of meaning; of vision; of purpose.
THRESHOLD CROSSING / THE EXPERIENCE
Crossing the threshold from the ordinary into the liminal; from clock time into ceremonial time, is akin to opening a portal into the great mysteries of life; the mysteries of nature and spirit. This crossing formally marks the several consecutive days and nights (often 4 days / 4 nights) of solo fasting in the wilderness, removed from many things comfortable and familiar.
It’s through the threshold phase of a Vision Fast that many opportunities and invitations arise:
reflecting and finding medicine in the unique challenges and complexities of one’s life
becoming deeply intimate and receptive to the subtleties and intricacies of nature
letting wildflower, red rivered fox, and croaking raven be one’s guide through the mysteries
bathing in the fertile grounds of one’s old life and the life that has yet to come
taking drink from the wellsprings of grief that flows through one’s life
simmering in the rich reservoirs of stillness and solitude
calling for support and guidance from ones ancestor spirits
claiming a life of regenerated vigour
engaging in self-guided ceremony that reflects one’s intentions and calling to Quest
witnessing and experiencing everything in nature as a mirror into one’s self and one’s life; through imagery, symbology, metaphor and myth
The threshold phase is truly multi-faceted, with the full spectrum emotional landscape of consciousness on offer. One could experience extreme bliss and euphoria, to intense pain and grief, to absolute boredom and loneliness, and everything in between.
The liminal landscape can potentiate different depths of ceremonial time. The light of day can bring upon the expansive qualities and transcendent characteristics of spirit’s illumination.
Darkness can bring upon another variety. A thinning of the veil; a blurring of the edges; a portal that brings out a different kind of mystery; a different kind of spirit. The trickster kind. The strange and inescapable kind. The porous blanket over the eyes kind. The Baba Yaga kind.
It’s not uncommon for guides to encourage an all-night vigil for the final night. After being tempered for those four days without food and comfort, that final evening of fighting off sleep to converse with the cauldron of mystery can simmer us in a special kind of way.
So it is when we ceremoniously step forth into the great uncertainties of the liminal time and space of a Vision Fast. This is not merely a moment in time that we step in and out of, rather, an opportunity for an ongoing conversation that we can continue to marinate in.
INCORPORATION / THE RETURN
Upon returning from the threshold, the final days of being in the formal community container of Quest are devoted to the stage of incorporation, also known as integration, or the return. This is a time for reuniting in council to share stories of one’s threshold time; exploring the themes, messages, gifts, and the greater implications of our Quest for our ever-unfolding lives.
Often, the Guides and the community at large will mirror these stories back to each participant, offering opportunities to see one’s threshold time from a wider context and expanded awareness, and to have the arc of one’s story and life honoured, witnessed, affirmed and supported in a rich, meaningful and heartful way.
Just as one’s preparation phase begins when one makes the commitment to Quest, one’s incorporation phase continues well after the initial return. Some might suggest that the incorporation of the gifts and medicines that a Vision Fast might offer (incorporation meaning to embody; take into the body) could continue to be assimilated and actualized for the rest of one’s life.
Jiddhu Krishnamurti, the Indian spiritual philosopher and mystic, once said, “It’s no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society” and so the beautiful challenge of integration resides not only in integrating the Quest into the arc of our lives, but integrating ourselves in a wholesome way; a regenerative way, back into our communities.
“There are no guarantees whatsoever that the vigil will grow fruit on the return. An enormous amount of that is down to the character and sheer devotion of the participant” writes Shaw in his wilderness vigil extraordinaire, Wolf Milk.
“It is easier to put the thing on the shelf with other esoteric holidays we’ve taken. I stress again that most of what happened out there happened underneath. You may not have received a roadmap but an atmosphere. An atmosphere to work out of…”
At the risk of overlabouring Martin Shaw’s quotes in this here detailing of Vision Fasts, his experience and wisdom on the matter is indeed relevant, including his succinct summation of the integration journey that lays ahead:
“Don’t come looking for honey if you’re not prepared to work like a bee.”
What is the Journey of Soul Initiation?
Embarking on a passage rite such as a Vision Quest can certainly intertwine with one’s journey of Soul Initiation.
As the depth psychologist, wilderness guide, and agent of cultural evolution Bill Plotkin suggests, “The journey of soul initiation can be a multi-year long process that enables us to remember who we were born to be, and what we were born to do in this lifetime.”
As opposed to Western psychological models of soul, Plotkin proposes that soul is an ecological concept, rather than solely a spiritual, psychological, or religious one. It’s suggested that Western psychology and religious ideology clouds the idea of soul because of our longstanding severance from nature; hence, these models are representative of this separation.
Not only does the idea of soul allude to an intimacy with something deep; the deepest meaning in our lives, but that the nature of soul resides with the larger framework of the web of life and our unique place within this ecology.
Thus, the idea of soul could be languaged as our original blueprint of who we were meant to be, what we were born to do, and how this unique blueprint belongs within the greater ecological niche of nature.
When the Grand Totality of All that there is; Great Spirit; God; The Absolute; Consciousness, moves through each of us, what manifests is the individualized life force essence that resides within; the unique instructions of who at a bone-deep level.
“I can’t express how monumentally life altering this experience was for me… emerging as a Man with renewed vitality, greater clarity of the bigger vision, and my power and place in manifesting it.
And most importantly, with the beautifully heavy responsibility and commitment of service to my tribe and progress toward my North Star.”
- Maurice Parfait | 2024 Vision Quest Participant
The Dark Road on the Descent to Soul
“If our first birth is a fall into life, this “second birth” falls toward death and the underworld. It requires a return to the roots of knowledge, the roots of consciousness, and the seeds of meaning hidden in each person. Only by a descent and a series of adventures along the dark roads of the unconscious can the inner life fully awaken…”
- Michael Meade | Mythologist, Storyteller
There’s truth to what Meade suggests; that this initiation and descent to soul isn’t necessarily safe, nor easy. There can be dangers abound both psycho-emotionally and spiritually, with disruptive forces piercing social relationships, career path, self identity, and life in a broader sense.
If the foundations on which we stand are shaky enough to be completely and dangerously dismantled by a descent to soul, it’s certainly suggestive that we need a restructuring and reorientation of the socio-cultural reality in which we situate ourselves and in which we find support to integrate these initiatory journeys.
The dangerous reality of a descent into soul initiation during these times is perhaps why the majority of people never reach a stage of maturation, where they find their unique individual way of enhancing life and co-operating with the dynamics of health, wellness, wholeness and evolution.
Due to the Western models surrounding mental health and the notion of soul, it’s not uncommon for conventional psychotherapists to want to rescue people and pull them out of this descent for fear of the dangers present.
“What’s more dangerous?” one might ask. Taking the arduous yet essential spiritual journey of soul initiation, or losing and forgetting these ways entirely?
Bill Plotkin’s work of channeling the Eco-Soulcentric Wheel of Development offers a model that transitions through eight significant life stages, and what those stages of human life look like “when we mature in full resonance with both nature (“eco”) and soul; when we are in a continuous process of becoming fully human throughout the lifespan.”
The journey of soul initiation takes root within this wheel of development, and in contrast to the three stages of a passage rite, Plotkin illuminates five stages of a Soul Initiation: Preparation, Dissolution, Soul Encounter, Metamorphosis, and Enactment.
The central phase of the journey of soul initiation is the descent, which is what Plotkin calls the Soul Encounter; receiving a vision or revelation of one’s unique place in the greater earth community.
The entire journey of soul initiation can be a long process that takes a person from the end of psychological adolescence, through a liminal initiation stage that can last several years, and culminates in the major life passage Plotkin calls Soul Initiation, which marks the beginning of true adulthood.
Healthy cultures are shaped by the work of true adults; soul initiated adults, and with very few initiated adults, who ultimately give rise to the elders that tend the relationships between humans and all of life, it’s nigh impossible to settle into the tapestry of a mature and healthy culture.
Plotkin notes that the soul itself is not capable of manifesting anything in this world; rather, it’s a mature and initiated ego coupled with the souls guidance that is the driving force for manifesting innovative delivery systems for the embodiment of soul in culture; for becoming “visionary artisans of cultural renaissance.”
Western culture is largely in tatters, and rather than passage rites and soul journeys offering a cementation and maturation into the healthy values of an already existing culture, those who find themselves initiated along this path are left with the burden of responsibility to pick up the pieces and tend what threads are left in rebirthing something new.
Let us find light in the words of the great poet Rumi: “Where there is ruin, there is hope for a treasure.”
The Vision Quest is a portal to metamorphose; a cocoon that can aid in the dissolution of our caterpillar bodies so that we may be transformed and reborn into a winged creation of beauty; enacting and actualizing our visions and prayers for a new earth to come.
The need for initiation is a bone-deep longing, however without the skillful guidance from adults and elders in our communities, we find unhealthy and unconscious attempts of initiation becoming rampant, manifesting through addictive, destructive, disconnected behaviours.
The African proverb speaks directly to what we see in our modern world: “If the young are not embraced by and initiated into the tribe, they’ll burn down the village just to feel the heat.”
Mythologist and storyteller Michael Meade suggests that “The initiation of youths always implies an opportunity for the cleansing and restoration of the life force of community. Initiating youths into full life also represents a critical opportunity for a society to sustain meaning and teach life-affirming values.”
It is essential that we reorient ourselves towards the curation of these initiatory passage rites.
Perhaps there’s a shred of truth in the words of Japanese poet Matsuo Basho: “Seek not the paths of the ancients; seek that which the ancients sought.”
This work is not only about the empowerment of the individual, but of equal importance is tending to the wider field in which an individual is situated, both socio-culturally, and ecologically — for the good of a healthy and wholesome community.
“Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach.”
- Clarissa Pinkola Estes | Woman Who Run With The Wolves
Send us a message if you’re hearing the call to Quest...
“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly;
what is essential is invisible to the eye.”
- The Little Fox, Unique in All The World | The Little Prince